the inbetween

when things are in flux, i never pick up my pen to write but i think that’s when i need to the most.

the last two weeks have gone by in a dizzying blur with my head trying to stay above water. i’ve moved everything i own into storage (temporarily) until i find an apartment and the scattering of my things has left me empty. not being able to use my favorite speckled ceramic plate or seeing my familiar vanilla scented candle next to my bed…my life feels like it’s moving faster than my brain can and i really just want to sleep.

i like to believe there’s lessons in most things and maybe right now it’s that i need chaos and instability to find new order. destruction is needed for creation. i tell myself that before i go to bed at night.

maybe it’s also an adventure. maybe having constant movement and lack of space will give me more of a chance to break free from some of my personal restraints.

I also did an egg cleanse the other day; an attempt to rid myself of curses and bad luck, which I hope works. i’ve been an unlucky girl in a chaotic world and i need a breather.

i’m going to write more this week. i’m going to sleep more too. and let things be in flux because surrendering is the greatest strength.